G                                                     D
When I was walking down the street, a billboard caught my eye
                                                          G
The advertisement written there would make you laugh and cry
                                                          C
The sign was torn and tattered from the storm the night before
                G              D              G
And as I gazed upon it, well, this is what I saw.


[Verse 2]

       G                                               D
Smoke Coca-Cola cigarettes. Drink Wrigley's Spearmint beer
                                                    G
Ken-L-Ration dog food makes your wife's complexion clear
                                                      C
Chew chocolate-covered mothballs -- they're sure to satisfy
                       G                 D                G
Brush your teeth with Lifebuoy soap and watch the suds go by


[Verse 3]

     G                                            D
When I recovered from the shock, I went along my way
                                                     G
I'd gone no further than a block, when there to my dismay
                                                    C
Another billboard caught my eye, just like the one before
                G          D              G
As I gazed upon it, well, this is what I sawr:


[Verse 4]

  G                                        D
Take your next vacation in a brand-new Frigidaire
                                      G
Learn to play piano in your winter underwear
                                          C
Simonize your baby with a Hershey's candy bar
              G           D               G
Texacos the beauty cream used by all the stars!


[Verse 5]

   G                                                   D
Doctors say that babies shouldn't smoke 'til they are three
                                      G
People over 35, take baths in Lipton Tea
                                              C
Oh, you can make the country a better place today --
                G                  D           G
Just buy a copy of this song and throw it far away!